Prone to Wander

I never had a strong faith, I still don't. Believe it or not, I still question if God if real or not. I am always 23 years old, shouldn't I have this figured out by now. I mean, I see his miracles in other people lives. I see him taking care of other people but I really feel like God forgot about me. Yes, I pray for certain things and I know he doesn't have to answer those things right away. But when I pray for those things for almost 3 years now and he doesn't give me anything, I feel forgotten.

I just want him to give me a reason for living. I just want him to show me my calling. I know there has, there has to be a purpose for my life. I feel worthless all the freaking time. I feel alone. I feel like there is no one behind me to catch if I fall.

I heard all my life, that God gives us our hearts desire but in his own timing. That can't be the answer for everything. It just can't be. I mean, if just seem like God likes seeing my hurting.

I just want a purpose.

Playing Catch Up

OK, so remember my post about 101 things in 1001 days. Yeah well, I have check off some but never blog about them. So here we go:

100. See Toy Story 3

I didn't get to see in the theaters, I had to wait until DVD. But I love it, Toy Story is just a great storyline and I would love to see more.

97. Get a new Car

Yes, I did. An 06 Chrysler Pacifica. When I brought it, it only had 6500 miles on it. Amazing right. I should have a picture of it but I don't. I really happy with my new car.

92. Spend all of my gift cards (seven) from this year (2010) before the year (2010) is over.

Well, I did and I got some really great deals. I mostly used them on black Friday. :)

91. See Vanessa new baby

Little Connor was born on Dec. 2nd 2010. Now is almost 2 months old and cute as can be. He gives his parents a hard time but they love him just the same. Big sister Abby is doing great at her new role.

66. Go to the Cleveland Zoo

(this is only half the goal but I finish the other half later) Vanessa and Kel and their kids and I went to this zoo, this passed week. It was cold but alot of things were indoors so it was amazing. We all had a blast.

62. Buy a second queen sheet set.

I did this also on Black Friday, there are aqua and fit in perfect with my bed. I love them, they are super soft.

50. In Nov. 2010, when my cell phone plan is up, get a GOOD phone.

Well I did, I got a blackberry bold. I love it. I never though I would have a smart phone but it amazing. I believe I did good.

Well, that it for now, hopefully I will do better this year. lol and I hope to have more pictures.